I am attending Charis Bible College. It was a HUGE step of faith to even go. It is an hour from home and for the most part, I just see myself as a stay at home mommy and that is about it. I enjoy home. I can go days in my house and not feel "I need to get out". I like cooking, baking, teaching and loving my kids. At the same time...I absolutely love people!! There are times that if I don't have adult conversation for a day...I kind of unload on my sweet T when he gets home. :D School has been great in this way. I can get lots of adult time and at the same time a lot of needed learning! :D
I am taking OT Survey 2, Bible Covenants 1, Relationship w/ God 1&2, Answers to Important Questions 1. On top of that a small elective...12 keys to Growth. It is a lot...but I seem to be absorbing it in and haven't felt totally overwhelmed..yet. I did only start back to class last night! hah!
This past year has been a really tough year. It has been confusing, frustrating, weird, and just plain no fun at times. I have searched my heart continually, judging myself....why!!?? During classes last night, it felt like God himself was speaking to me. We are starting in the book of Joshua in OT Survey. In Joshua 1:2, God states the obvious..."Moses My servant is dead.". It was a word of the Lord to me. Moses is dead!!! I could have shouted...MOSES IS DEAD!! Hallelujah!!
What does it mean you ask? It means that in chapter 1 of Joshua God is giving instruction to a man that was appointed new leader of a group of people. He is stating the obvious to say..."look, Moses is dead...you are the new leader...be strong and courageous..I am with you. A new season. Look forward. Don't look back...look to Me..I will guide you, bless you...only be strong and courageous." Obviously, Joshua needed to hear this. He had seen Moses lead. He had seen the children of Israel. He saw how they complained and blamed Moses and threatened to kill him multiple times. It was encouragement and instruction for the new leader and it was said so awesomely!
I needed to hear these words. How often do we remain in the past?? How often do we refuse to move on because we refuse to forgive ourselves when God himself has already forgiven and moved on?? 2010 is dead. I have repented of what I knew to repent of and gave God the rest that confuses and grieves my heart. I cannot change the past. Time to move on. Moses is dead!! :D